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Encouraging Peace Through Contemplative Dialogue
Presentation Sister Janice Klein, Aberdeen
We believe that when we search for agreement around shared values of justice and compassion, we help create solutions to difficult social and political problems. ~South Dakota Faith and Public Life website
When politics arise in a conversation, it is natural to find oneself in an uncomfortable discussion from time to time. Conflict is often viewed as negative, but it can really be a positive thing if the discussion and respect of the other person is present.
Even when we disagree, we want to remember to value the relationship. All faiths call us to respect one another, no matter how much we disagree. Every person is made in the image of God and is loved into being by God.
The thought, “I am right so therefore you are wrong,” is dualistic thinking and the root of countless arguments. Violence often stems from this rationale. So how do we discipline ourselves and share with others of varying perspectives that there can be a both/and instead of an either/or?
As sisters, we call each other to the practice of contemplative dialogue, a compassionate, shared process. It sets aside bias and is done with respect of the other person. It allows for quiet periods together to listen for the new to emerge and create a common ground. This includes the following points:
- Listen deeply. Truly be there to hear what the other person has to say. Do not judge. Set aside other distractions. Do not focus on your rebuttal. Be intent to understand. Listen with an open mind.
- Refrain from impulsive speech and action. It is human to have a “reaction” when we hear something that passionately disagrees with our core. To pause and ponder before speaking or reacting can make a remarkable difference in the outcome of the conversation.
- Practice civility with mutual respect. Treat others how you would like to be treated. Give others the benefit of the doubt.
- Sit quietly together to let the new emerge. If we believe that God/Spirit is working in each person then we honor them, respect them and search for the common ground with them. This implies surrender to God and a giving over, trusting that God will indeed lead. Relinquishing my agenda to see what can emerge by our contemplative dialogue together, which neither could have realized alone.
We encouraged our partners and friends to take steps to practice contemplative dialogue with someone of a different political opinion. How might deeper listening be enhanced in your life?
The above article was adapted from an October 2016 publication in the Sioux Falls, S.D., based magazine, BizNOW. The Aberdeen Presentation Sisters are partnering with this magazine to help share our voice through a monthly social justice article. Sister Janice’s article on contemplative dialogue is one way we have tried to support others working through conflict.